obamasnow:

obamasnow:

today some guy very confidently ordered a “Busted Nut Parfait” on drive thru without hesitation and i had to ask if he meant a peanut buster parfait without crying

update: today someone asked for a peanut buster parfait with “light syrup and heavy nut” and i laughed from the ice cream machine and he heard me

prettypositivity:

if it makes you happy, it’s not a waste

bace-jeleren:

trans-mouse:

john-marshall:

john-marshall:

john-marshall:

use the right knives when you cook please

i’m not kidding and i’m not being mean i’m watching these videos of people trying to cut like, carrots, and they’re using butcher knives, and i just… I cook a lot and I don’t own a butcher knife, I’ve never had one, I’ve never needed one. I don’t cleave through… bone like. please

like listen, this set is $18.99 with the coupon it has available right now. unless you do a lot of cooking in which case you’re not the target audience of this post you don’t need more knives than this like… please

from left to right: 

• paring knife: it’s good for small cuts. deseeding a jalapeno, cutting up strawberries.
• utility knife: allegedly these make cutting tomatoes easier. i don’t actually find cutting tomatoes difficult, so i don’t know. i use it mostly for trimming meat.
• santoku knife: this is essentially a chef’s knife with a straight blade. it’s good for veggies. 
• chef’s knife: i use a chef’s knife for almost everything. it can chop a head of romaine and it can cut a chicken breast in half. whatever. just don’t use it for tiny shit. 
• slicing knife: good for slicing cooked meats
• bread knife: bread

it’s also gay.

and here’s a cutting board with a knife sharpener. keeping your knives sharp is a good idea because cuts from dull knives are harder to treat, are more likely to get infected, and are more painful over time. cuts happen but you can reduce your risks

Who wants to get me some knives?

Gay knives save lives